THE SONGS

CHIM CHIM CHEREE (PROLOGUE) [BERT] Wind's in the east, there's a mist comin' in Like somethin' is brewin' and 'bout to begin Can't put me finger on what lies in store But I feel what's to 'appen all 'appened before A father, a mother, a daughter, a son The threads of their lives are all wrapped in and done Somethin' is needed to twist 'em as tight As a string you might use when you're flying a kite Chim chiminy chim chim cheree chim cheroo CHERRY TREE LANE PART 1 [MRS BRILL] Katie Nana! Who gets stuck with the children with no nanny in the house? Me, that's who! [KATIE NANA] I've said my say, Mrs Brill, and that's all I'll say. I've done with this house forever! [MRS BRILL] Well, good riddance, then. [WINIFRED] Katie Nana! Gone? Are you quite sure [MRS BRILL] Gone! And is it any wonder? [WINIFRED] Choosing the right nanny I keep drawing blanks Do you really think I made another blunder What on earth am I to say to Mr Banks? George, dear I'm feeling so bereft, dear Another nanny's left, dear Every nanny goes We're unlucky, I suppose [WINIFRED, MRS BRILL, JANE, MICHAEL & ROBERTSON AY] We are never going to find the perfect nanny [GEORGE] Nonsense! Precision and order That's all that I ask The running of a household A straightforward task The children, the servants They're all your domain Whilst I remain the sovereign Of Cherry Tree Lane Coat! [MRS BRILL] Coming, sir. [GEORGE] The simple truth is you’ve engaged six nannies over the last four months and they’ve all been unqualified disasters. A nanny should govern A nanny should rule A nanny is a paragon Who suffers no fool A nanny’s a stalwart Our children would gain By having such a nanny In Cherry Tree Lane [WINIFRED] Of course, George but-- [GEORGE] So take control of situations Show your authority When interviewing staff You know your role They know their stations Efficiency and forethought Cut the jobs in half Briefcase. [WINIFRED] I thought Katie Nana would be firm with the children. She always looked so cross. [GEORGE] Winifred, never confuse efficiency with a liver complaint. [WINIFRED] Clear thinking, sound judgement [GEORGE] That’s how to advance [GEORGE & WINIFRED] Then things will run like clockwork [GEORGE] Leave nothing to chance When nannies go missing The answer is plain Our children must be monsters [WINIFRED] Oh how can they be monsters? [GEORGE & WINIFRED] In Cherry Tree Lane [GEORGE] Umbrella. [WINIFRED] Oh, if only we could find someone like your old nanny. [GEORGE] I’m afraid that’s not realistic, my dear. Few women alive could manage Miss Andrew’s standards of efficiency. Besides, we could never afford someone of her calibre. [MRS BRILL & ROBERTSON AY] Precision and order He wants nothing less [ROBERTSON AY] It’s like an army barracks [MRS BRILL] Yes, and we’re in a mess [MRS BRILL & ROBERTSON AY] No wonder the nannies are driven insane We’re living in a madhouse In Cherry Tree Lane [GEORGE] Now, place an advertisment in the Times stating that Jane and Michael Banks require the best possible nanny… At the lowest possible wage. [JANE] Father, we’ve written our own advertisment. [GEORGE] What? [WINIFRED] Oh please, George, I think we should hear it. [JANE] Wanted. A nanny for two adorable children. [GEORGE] Adorable? Well, that's debatable, I must say. THE PERFECT NANNY [JANE] If you want this choice position Have a cheery disposition Rosy cheeks, no warts [MICHAEL] That's the part I put in. [JANE] Play games, all sorts You must be kind, you must be witty Very sweet and fairly pretty [GEORGE] Of all the ridiculous-- [WINIFRED] Oh, George, please. [JANE] Take us on outings, give us treats [MICHAEL] Sing songs, bring sweets Never be cross or cruel Never feed us castor oil or gruel [JANE] Love us as a son and daughter [MICHAEL] And never smell of barley water I put that bit in, too. [JANE] If you won't scold and dominate us We will never give you cause to hate us We won't hide your spectacles so you can't see [MICHAEL] Put toads in your bed, or pepper in your tea [JANE] Hurry nanny, many thanks [JANE AND MICHAEL] Sincerely [JANE] Jane [MICHAEL] And Michael [JANE & MICHAEL] Banks CHERRY TREE LANE PART 2 [GEORGE] That is quite enough tommy rot for one day. Would you please go upstairs and let me get to work! I might have guessed The wind is blowing And it’s an easterly It’s bound to bring a chill I’m underdressed I must be going Fetch my gloves and scarf Or I’ll be later still Where’s my hat? He’s brushed it with boot polish! [ALL] Precision and order That’s all that (he asks/I ask) The running of a household A straightforward task The children, the servants They’re all (your/my/her) domain [GEORGE] Whilst I remain the sovereign Mind you, use your day well. [WINIFRED] You remain the sovereign [GEORGE] I shall be home at six o’clock sharp. [ALL] He remains the sovereign Of Cherry Tree Lane PRACTICALLY PERFECT [MARY POPPINS] By the time the wind has blown The weather vane around I’ll show you, if I can No matter what the circumstance For one thing I’m renown My character is spit-spot spic and span I’m practically perfect In every way [JANE] Practically perfect? [MARY POPPINS] So people say Each virtue virtually knows no bound Each trait is great and patently sound I’m practically perfect from head to toe If I had a fault it would never dare to show I’m so practically perfect In every way Both prim and proper and never too stern Well-educated yet willing to learn I’m clean and honest, my manner refined And I wear shoes of the sensible kind I suffer no nonsense and whilst I remain There’s nothing else I feel I need explain I’m practically perfect in every way Practically perfect, that’s my forte Uncanny nannies are hard to find Unique, yet meek, unspeakably kind I’m practically perfect, not slightly soiled Running like an engine that’s just been freshly oiled I’m so practically perfect In every way Well, those are my credentials. Perhaps you have a few questions? [MICHAEL] Not temperamental? [MARY POPPINS] Never. [MICHAEL] Not grouchy or gruff? [MARY POPPINS] Oh, the very thought. [JANE] Will you stay tender When the going gets tough? [MARY POPPINS] Quite the contrary. [MICHAEL] Do you read stories Without a big fuss? [MARY POPPINS] Mmm-hmm. [JANE] Or have objections To playing with us? [MARY POPPINS] Oh, I like games, but I choose them. Some minor improvements may not go amiss But at all times you must remember this [JANE & MICHAEL] You’re practically perfect In every way [MARY POPPINS] I guarantee [JANE & MICHAEL] Practically perfect We hope you’ll stay [MARY POPPINS] No flies on me Each virtue virtually knows no bound Each trait is great [JANE & MICHAEL] And patently sound [MARY POPPINS] Patently sound Spit-spot! Jane, put your toys away, please. [JANE] Do I have to? [MARY POPPINS] Yes. Michael, tidy your things. [MICHAEL] It’s not fair! [MARY POPPINS] I didn’t say I was fair. I said… I’m practically perfect, and here’s my aim By the time I leave here you both will be the same You’ll be practically perfect [JANE & MICHAEL] Practically perfect [MARY POPPINS, JANE & MICHAEL] You (We) will be practically perfect In every way JOLLY HOLIDAY [BERT] All that it takes is a spark Then something, plain as a park Becomes a wonderland All you have to do Is look a-new Then you’ll understand Why it’s a jolly holiday with Mary Mary makes your heart so light [MARY POPPINS] Oh, really. [BERT] When the day is grey and ordinary Mary makes the sun shine bright [MARY POPPINS] You do talk nonsense, Bert. [BERT] Oh, 'appiness is blooming all around 'er The daffodils are smiling at the dove [MARY POPPINS] I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about. [BERT] When Mary holds your 'and [MARY POPPINS] Bert. [BERT] You feel so grand Your 'eart starts beatin' Like a big brass band [MARY POPPINS] You’ve got enough brass for all of us. [BERT] Oh, it’s a jolly holiday with Mary No wonder that it’s Mary that we love Come along, you two. [JANE & MICHAEL] Boring, just like other nannies Thinking parks are good for us It’s just statues, ducks and grannies I don’t understand all the fuss [JANE] Is she doing it to spite us? [MICHAEL] We could lose her for a lark [JANE] Perhaps it’s all a plot [MICHAEL] I’ll tell you what She seems so different [JANE & MICHAEL] But I bet she’s not There is nothing to excite us In the park [JANE] Who are you? [NELEUS] I’m Neleus, and I thought Mary Poppins would never let me get down from this plinth! [BERT] Ain’t it a glorious day Right as a morning in May [NELEUS] I feel like I could fly Have you ever seen The grass so green? [MARY POPPINS] Oh, Bert. Or a bluer sky? [BERT & NELEUS] Oh, it’s a jolly holiday with Mary [BERT] Bad days I’ve never known You can ask the passing statuary [STATUES] Nothing’s ever set in stone [BERT] You’re looking tip-top from top to toe. If I may say so. [MARY POPPINS] Thank you, Bert. And you may. [STATUES] Oh it’s a jolly holiday with Mary No wonder that it’s Mary that we love [BERT] Oi! Do you think Neleus is lookin' a bit timid today? [MICHAEL] No. Why? [BERT] I knew him when he was a little bolder. A little boulder, ha ha! To see a statue dance like that You can’t believe your eyes You fear you’ve lost your marbles But the thinker thinks you’re wise So you should hasten, call a mason Tell him what you’ve seen If he knows his craft he’ll think you’re daft But we’ll know what you mean [MALE STATUES] Oh it’s a jolly holiday with Mary No wonder that it’s Mary that we love [BERT] Now Notre Dame can cause alarm And I’ve me own hunch why Those gargoyles need to gargle ‘Cos their throats get rather dry And just between us, I know Venus Has a vice that shocks She often drinks with a sphinx who winks It's neat and on the rocks [STATUES] Oh, it’s a jolly holiday with Mary No wonder that it’s Mary that we love [BERT] Let’s go for jaunty saunter You are bound to make your mark Looks like all of you were all born to Take a promenade in the park With those finely-chiselled features You can look down from above Each man out with his dog would stand agog To see a statue take a gentle jog [BERT & STATUES] It’s (it's) no (no) wonder that it’s Mary That (that) we (we) love [STATUES] Love love love Love love love [BERT] No wonder that it’s Mary that we love [MARY POPPINS] It’s a jolly holiday with you, Bert Gentlemen like you are few Though you’re just a diamond in the rough, Bert Underneath, your blood is blue [STATUES] Your blood is blue [MARY POPPINS] You’d never think of pressing your advantage Forbearance is the hallmark of your creed A lady needn’t fear when you are near Your sweet gentility is crystal clear [STATUES] It’s crystal clear [MARY POPPINS & FEMALE STATUES] Oh, it’s a jolly holiday with you, Bert [STATUES & STATUES] It’s a jolly holiday [MARY & STATUES] A jolly, jolly holiday with you [STATUES] With you [JANE, MICHAEL & FEMALE STATUES] Oh it’s a jolly holiday with Mary Mary makes your heart so light When the day is grey and ordinary Mary makes the sun shine bright Oh happiness is blooming all around her The daffodils are smiling at the dove [BERT & MALE STATUES] Let’s go for jaunty saunter We are bound to make our mark Looks like all of us were all born to Take a promenade in the park With our finely-chiseled features We can look down from above [BERT, JANE, MICHAEL & STATUES] When Mary holds your hand You feel so grand Your heart starts beating Like a big brass band [BERT, JANE, MICHAEL & FEMALE STATUES] Oh it’s a jolly holiday with Mary [MALE STATUES] It's no wonder that it's Mary that we love [BERT, JANE, MICHAEL & STATUES] No wonder that it’s Mary that we love CHERRY TREE LANE (REPRISE) / BEING MRS BANKS / JOLLY HOLIDAY (REPRISE) [GEORGE] What good a rules if you can bend them? We need a nanny who is disciplined and stern With boys and girls you don’t befriend them I fear that Mary Poppins has a lot to learn Precision and order Our credo for life It’s always been a comfort to me And my wife But now in our midst there’s Well, I can’t explain But something is unsettling In Cherry Tree Lane [WINIFRED] Being Mrs Banks Should be an easy role And yet it’s one Which I don’t seem to good at On the whole I have a comfy home I have a simple life I have a name which tells the world I’m someone else’s wife Being Mrs Banks What does that entail? Facing tests of character I always seem to fail And as for his ‘best’ people Well, I’d like to say “no thanks” They’re not exactly my idea Of being Mrs Banks [JANE] I still feel as if I’m dreaming [MICHAEL] So much fun in just one day [JANE & MICHAEL] When Mary holds your hand You feel so grand Your heart starts beating Like a big brass band [JANE] Do look! Neleus is beaming! [MICHAEL] Let’s hope she will stay [JANE] Good night, Neleus. [JANE & MICHAEL] Let’s hope she will stay A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR [MARY POPPINS] In every job that must be done There is an element of fun You find the fun and snap! The job's a game And ev'ry task you undertake Becomes a piece of cake A lark! A spree! It's very clear to see That a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down The medicine go down, medicine go down Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down In a most delightful way My point exactly. A robin feathering his nest Has very little time to rest Whilst gathering his bits of twine and twig Though quite intent in his pursuit He has a merry tune to toot He knows a song Will move the job along [MARY POPPINS, JANE & MICHAEL] For a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down The medicine go down, medicine go down Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down In a most delightful way [MARY POPPINS] Spit spot! The honey bees that fetch the nectar From the flowers to the comb Never tire of ever buzzing to and fro Because they take a litle nip From ev'ry flower that they sip Mmm, rum punch! My favourite. And hence [ROBERTSON AY] And hence [MARY POPPINS] They find [ROBERTSON AY] They find [MARY POPPINS & ROBERTSON AY] Their task is not a grind [MARY POPPINS] Just a spoonful of sugar Helps the medicine go down [WINIFRED] The medicine? [MARY POPPINS] Go down Medicine [WINIFRED] Go down [MARY POPPINS, JANE & MICHAEL] Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down In a most delightful way [WINIFRED] So just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down [ROBERTSON AY] The medicine go down [WINIFRED] Medicine go down [WINIFRED, JANE & MICHAEL] Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down [MARY POPPINS] In a most delightful way [ALL] In a most delightful way Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down The medicine go down, medicine go down Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down In a most delightful way In a most delightful way In a most delightful way FEED THE BIRDS [BIRD WOMAN] Feed the birds, tuppence a bag Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag Feed the birds, tuppence a bag Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag [MARY POPPINS] Early each day to the steps of St. Paul's The little old bird woman comes In her own special way to the people she calls [BIRD WOMAN] Come buy my bags full of crumbs Come feed the little birds Show 'em you care And you'll be glad if you do Their young ones are hungry Their nests are so bare All it takes is tuppence from you Feed the birds, tuppence a bag Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag [MARY POPPINS] "Feed the birds", that's what she cries While overhead her birds fill the skies All around the cathedral The saints and apostles Look down as she sells her wares Although you can't see them You know they are smiling Each time someone shows that he cares Though her words are simple and few Listen, listen she's calling to you [BIRD WOMAN] Feed the birds, tuppence a bag [MARY POPPINS & BIRD WOMAN] Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag [BIRD WOMAN] Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS [MARY POPPINS] Super... calif... ragil... istic... expialid... ocious! [MICHAEL] That's not a word. [MARY POPPINS] Of course it's a word. And unless I'm very much mistaken, I think it's going to prove a rather useful one. When trying to express oneself it's frankly quite absurd To leap through lengthy lexicons to find the perfect word A little spontaneity keeps conversation keen You need to find a way to say precisely what you mean Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious If you say it loud enough you'll always sound precocious Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious [MARY POPPINS, BERT, MRS CORRY & CUSTOMERS] Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay [JANE] But it doesn't mean anything! [BERT, MRS CORRY & CUSTOMERS] Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay [MARY POPPINS] It can mean exactly what you want it to. When stone age men were chatting simply grunting would suffice [BERT] Though if they'd heard this word they might 'ave used it once or twice [MARY POPPINS] That's right. [MRS CORRY] I'm sure Egyptian pharoahs would have grasped it in a jiff Then every single pyramid would bear this heiroglyph Oh supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Say it and wild animals would not seem so ferocious [MARY POPPINS] Add some further flourishes it's so rococcococious [MRS CORRY] Ah [MARY POPPINS] Ah [BERT] Ah ah ah ah [ALL] Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay [BERT] The druids could have carved it on their mighty monoliths [MARY POPPINS] Oh, yes. [MRS CORRY] The Ancient Greeks I'm certain would have used it in their myths [MARY POPPINS] I'm sure the Roman Empire only entered the abyss Because those Latin scholars never had a word like this [ALL] Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious [MARY POPPINS] If you say it softly the effect can be hypnotious [BERT] Check your breath before you speak in case it's halitotious [MARY POPPINS] Oh, Bert! [ALL] Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay Um-diddle-diddle-diddle-um-diddle-ay [MARY POPPINS] Of course, you can say it backwards, which is suoicodilaipxecitsiligarfilacrepus. [BERT] She may be tricky, but she's bloody good. [MARY POPPINS] So when the cat has got your tongue there's no need for dismay Just summon up this word and then you've got a lot to say [BERT] Just pick out those eighteen consonants and sixteen vowels as well And put them in an order which is very 'ard to spell [MARY POPPINS] S. U. P. E. R. [BERT] R. [MARY POPPINS] C. A. L. I. F. [BERT] F. [MARY POPPINS] R. A. G. I. L. [BERT] L. [JANE & MICHAEL] I. S. T. I. C. E. X. P. I. A. L. I. D. O. C. I. O. U. S. [BERT] Clever clogs. [ALL] S. U. P. E. R. C. A. L. I. F. R. A. G. I. L. I. S. T. I C. E. X. P. I. A. L. I. D. O. C. I. O. U. S. S. U. P. E. R. C. A. L. I. F. R. A. G. I. L. I. S. T. I C. E. X. P. I. A. L. I. D. O. C. I. O. U. S. S. U. P. E. R. C. A. L. I. F. R. A. G. I. L. I. S. T. I C. E. X. P. I. A. L. I. D. O. C. I. O. U. S. [BERT] Here we go! [ALL] Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious If you say it loud enough you'll always sound precocious Supercalifragilistic [JANE & MICHAEL] Supercalifragilistic [ALL] Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

TEMPER TEMPER [JANE] What’s happening? I don’t understand! [VALENTINE] I’m sure you don’t, Jane. You and Michael think you have nothing to learn but you don’t understand the simplest things. [MICHAEL] Why are you all so big? [WILLIAM] You'll find out. [VALENTINE] Children who lose their temper will lose everything else in the end. [TOYS] Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper [VALENTINE] Temper, temper Caught you at last Your quick temper Went a bit fast This is a place of woe [TOYS] This is a place of woe [VALENTINE] This a place where all [TOYS] Wicked children go [MICHAEL] But this is our nursery! [VALENTINE] No, this is *our* nursery. [TOYS] Temper, temper, that was your crime We’ve been watching you for some time We knew that you'd appear (That you'd appear) We knew your temper tantrums would lead you here [JANE] Stop! Leave us alone! [WILLIAM] Pray silence for the judge! [MICHAEL] What judge? [WILLIAM] All rise. [MR PUNCH] Temper, temper, silence in court Is this not the story you thought? You have to stand on trial [TOYS] Stand on trial [MR PUNCH] You will not see your parents For quite some time [VALENTINE & WILLIAM] Children who refuse to learn [TOYS] Will not return Children who refuse to learn Will not return [MR PUNCH] Are you Jane and Michael Banks? [JANE] Yes, and we live at Seventeen Cherry Tree Lane. [MONKEY 1] Not anymore, you don’t. You’re at destiny’s crossroads. [MR PUNCH] You stand accused of the wanton lost of a most important commodity. Namely, your temper! [VALENTINE] Call the first witness! [MONKEYS] Call the first witness! [WILLIAM] Call the first witness! [DOLL] Temper, temper, think of the cost Of a temper, once it’s been lost You cannot get it back [TOYS] Cannot get it back [DOLL] It’s no excuse to say [TOYS] That your mood was black [VALENTINE] Call the surprise witness! [MONKEYS] Call the surprise witness! [WILLIAM] Call the surprise witness! [JACK-IN-A-BOX] Surprise! Yes, I saw them, your Honour. They were fighting over Valentine. [MR PUNCH] Go on. [JACK-IN-A-BOX] And… And tore his arm! Again! [TOYS] Children who refuse to learn Will not return Children Children who refuse to learn Return Will not return Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper Temper, temper [MR PUNCH] What is your verdict? [TOYS] Guilty! [JUDGE] You stand there bold as brass You face the stiffest sentence this court can ask [TOYS] Children who refuse to learn Will not return Children who refuse to learn Will not return Children who refuse to learn Will not return Temper, temper! CHIM CHIM CHEREE (ROOFTOP DUET) [BERT] Up where the smoke is all billowed and curled ‘Tween pavement and stars is the chimney sweep’s world Where there’s hardly no day nor 'ardly no night There’s things half in shadows and halfways in light On the rooftops of London, coo, what a sight [MARY POPPINS] Oh, you’re a sweep now, are you? [BERT] Best view in the world, eh? And who gets to see it? The birds, the stars and the chimney sweeps. Nothing to beat it, eh? Now as the ladder of life has been strung You may think a sweep’s on the bottom-most rung Though I spends me time in the ashes and smoke In this whole wide world there’s no 'appier bloke [MARY POPPINS & BERT] Chim chiminy chim chiminy chim chim cheree A sweep is as lucky, as lucky can be Chim chiminy chim chiminy chim chim cheroo [MARY POPPINS Good luck will rub off when he shakes hands with you [BERT] Or blow me a kiss [MARY POPPINS] Bert! [BERT] And that’s lucky, too Does this mean you’re going? [MARY POPPINS] The wind’s changed. [BERT] Ah, but they’re good kids, Mary. [MARY POPPINS] Would I be bothering with them, if they weren’t? But I can’t help them if they won’t let me, and no one is so hard to teach as a child who knows everything. [BERT] So? [MARY POPPINS] So, they’ve got to do the next bit on their own. [MARY POPPINS & BERT] Chim chiminy chim chiminy chim chim cheree [MARY POPPINS] When you’re with a sweep, you’re in glad company Goodbye, Bert. [BERT] Chim chim chim chim cheree When you’re with a sweep, you’re in glad company Nowhere is there a more happier crew Then them’s what sings chim chim cheree chim cheroo Chim chiminy chim chim cheree chim [MARY POPPINS] Cheerio, Bert! Keep an eye on them for me. [MICHAEL] What’s happened? Mary Poppins’ things have gone. [JANE] The wind’s changed! She’s left us. [MRS BRILL] What in the name of heaven are the two of you up to? Oh dear. Where’s Mary Poppins? [JANE] She’s gone. [MRS BRILL] Gone? Well, if she doesn’t have a heart of stone and no mistake. [JANE] She left us a note. [MICHAEL] What does it say? [JANE] Mrs Brill, what does au revoir mean? [MRS BRILL] Why? [JANE] Because that’s what she’s written on it. “Dear Jane and Michael, keep playing the games. Au revoir. Mary Poppins.” [MRS BRILL] Well, I’m not up on these foreign tongues but it’s French, I know that. Now let’s see. Does it mean God bless you? Or is it good luck? Oh, now I remember now. It means “til we meet again”. Now will you come on in before you catch your death! BRIMSTONE AND TREACLE PART 1 [MISS ANDREW] These children have been spoiled I’ve arrived here just in time By chance I’ve brought the punishment That best befits the crime Brimstone and treacle and cod liver oil Liberal doses of each These are the treats from which children recoil The lessons I’m going to teach Just follow my model And don’t molly-coddle It may lead the irksome to irk So seek satisfaction From punitive action Brimestone and treacle will work Open! [MICHAEL] Does it taste as bad as it smells? [MISS ANDREW] Worse. [MICHAEL] Do I have to? [MISS ANDREW] Open! Brimstone and treacle and carbolic soap These are the tools of my trade With spoonfuls of sugar you don’t have a hope Of seeing that changes are made Where manners are chronic My tincture's the tonic That’s certain to wipe off a smirk Just pour out a ration In matronly fashion Brimstone and treacle will work I won’t stand for simpering, whinging and whimpering Sucking of thumbs is absurd Observe every letter for children are better When they can be seen and not heard Your son will go to boarding school at once. As for the girl, I shall take charge of her myself. To cosset and pamper Will hinder and hamper The child in whom bad habits lurk First threaten to throttle Then uncork the bottle Brimstone and treacle will work Brimstone and treacle will work LET'S GO FLY A KITE [BERT] With tuppence for paper and strings You can have your own set of wings With your feet on the ground You're a bird in flight With your fist holding tight To the string of your kite Oh, oh, oh Let's go fly a kite Up to the highest height Let's go fly a kite And send it soaring Up through the atmosphere Up where the air is clear Oh, let's go fly a kite [BERT & PARK KEEPER] When you send it flying up there All at once you're lighter than air You can dance on the breeze Over houses and trees With your fist holding tight To the string of your kite [BERT, PARK KEEPER, JANE & MICHAEL] Oh, oh, oh Let's go fly a kite Up to the highest height Let's go fly a kite And send it soaring Up through the atmosphere Up where the air is clear Oh, let's go fly a kite [BERT] Reel it in! [MICHAEL] I can't, it's stuck. [JANE] I'll help. [PARK KEEPER] Here, let me. [MARY POPPINS] Aaaah... [KITE FLYERS] Oh let's go fly a kite Up to the highest height Oh let's go fly a kite GOOD FOR NOTHING / BEING MRS BANKS (REPRISE) [GEORGE] When you realise your worst fears have been realised And certainties now seem a bit less sure Ideals that at one time one idealised Now don't seem so ideal any more Where once there was order Chaos has been loosed And home truths like chickens Are coming home to roost Illusions may shatter But memories stay The things that really matter I lost on the way The sovereign, the master And long may he reign The famous good-for-nothing Of Cherry Tree Lane [WINIFRED] George, dear I know it hurts your pride, dear But you can't just run and hide, dear Why can't you see that I'm here and I am on your side Whenever you spoke of Miss Andrew You showered the woman with praise But now that I've met dear Miss Andrew There are one or two things I'd rephrase To think you were raised by that monster And carried that burden through life If only you had seen that you Could share it with your wife Being Mrs Banks It's easy to forget The way I felt that summer's day The day that we first met Being Mrs Banks Being kissed by you A man of dreams Who made me feel That wishes could come true And now although you're lost It's time that we closed ranks I'll fight for the man who needs freeing The real you no one is seeing And you'll find a way of just being Being Mister Banks BRIMSTONE AND TREACLE PART 2 [MICHAEL] Perhaps she’s killed everyone. Perhaps they’re all dead. [JANE] What’s that? [MARY POPPINS] It’s a caged bird! Did she, well frankly, that’s not a surprise Locked in this cage and not free in the skies For two years? How shameful Yes, of course, that’s a field I know well An hour, no longer Your wings will grow stronger Once you are free from this cell [MICHAEL] What kind of bird is it? [MARY POPPINS] A lark. You are seeing a lark in a cage for the first time, and the last. My pleasure. Oh, don’t mention it. [MISS ANDREW] So, children. You’ve decided to come crawling back, have you? Well, I think we know what’s needed now. Brimstone and treacle, my favourite liquor That will make runaways stop Impudent children respond so much quicker When forced to drink every last drop [MARY POPPINS] Is this what you’re looking for? [MISS ANDREW] Who are you? [MARY POPPINS] I’m Mary Poppins. [MISS ANDREW] Mary Poppins? But you left. Without notice. [MARY POPPINS] And I’ve come back without notice. [MISS ANDREW] I see. And what do you expect me to do? [MARY POPPINS] Pack. [MISS ANDREW] Pack?! Silly little girl with your new-fangled methods I bring up children so they know their place Standing for tradition I govern my charges [MARY POPPINS] Mishandled charges blow up in your face [MISS ANDREW] I brought up their father [MARY POPPINS] Well that I don’t doubt You must be so proud At the way he turned out [MISS ANDREW] A shining example, a pillar [MARY POPPINS] A post They all have their problems But him more than most [MISS ANDREW] You’ve let my little lark out of his cage Now you will bear the full brunt of my rage Brimstone and treacle for you Brimstone and treacle for you [MARY POPPINS] Just a spoonful of sugar [MISS ANDREW] Brimstone and treacle for you [MARY POPPINS] Just a spoonful of sugar [MISS ANDREW] Brimstone and treacle for you [MARY POPPINS] Just a spoonful of sugar Ah… [MARY POPPINS vs MISS ANDREW] Ah… Ah… [MARY POPPINS] I recognise fully That you are a bully Who views cruel deeds as a perk Well, now here’s a catch Because you’ve met your match Brimstone and treacle [MISS ANDREW] Brimstone and treacle [MARY POPPINS] Brimstone and treacle [MISS ANDREW] Brimstone and treacle [MARY POPPINS & MISS ANDREW] Won’t work STEP IN TIME [SWEEPS] Brush away the dirt and soot Brush away your tears Cobwebs that aren't swept away Hang around for years In all weathers, up all hours We can see for miles Our idea of heaven is A night out on the tiles We may look a motley crew (We may look a motley crew) Smudged with tar and grime (Smudged with tar and grime) But when you need a helping hand (But when you need a helping hand) We try to step in Try to step in Try to step in Just in time [BERT] We will step in [SWEEPS] Step in time [BERT] We will step in [SWEEPS] Step in time [BERT] Never need a reason, never need a rhyme [BERT & SWEEPS] We will step in, step in time Over the rooftops step in time Over the rooftops step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Over the rooftops step in time Watch where you step but step in time Watch where you step but step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Watch where you step but step in time Kick your knees up, step in time Kick your knees up, step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Kick your knees up, step in time [MARY POPPINS] Childhood is a step in time Parenthood's the same [MARY POPPINS & BERT] Never miss a chance to get it right [BERT] Don't it seem a perfect crime Don't it seem a shame [MARY POPPINS & BERT] When the steps aren't going As smoothly as they might [SWEEPS] That's when we step in, step in time That's when we step step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme That's when we step in, step in time Spin spin spin spin spin Link your elbows, step in time Link your elbows, step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Link your elbows, step in time Link your elbows, step in time Step in time, step step in time [MARY POPPINS] Just remember when you're low Feeling in the wars Someone's up your chimney [SWEEPS] And it isn't Santa Claus If you need us, if you don't (If you need us, if you don't) Doesn't make much odds (Doesn't make much odds) We'll be watching over you (We'll be watching over you) Brushes, brooms and Brushes, brooms and Brushes, brushes, brooms and [BERT] And rods [SWEEPS] Over the rooftops Over the rooftops Over the rooftops Over the rooftops Over the rooftops step in time Over the rooftops step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme [BERT] Over the rooftops step in time [SWEEPS] Link your elbows, step in time Link your elbows, step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Link your elbows, step in time Kick your knees up, step in time Kick your knees up, step in time Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Kick your knees up, step in time Oh step in time, step in time Step step step Step in time, step in time Step step step Never need a reason, never need a rhyme Never need a reason, never need a rhyme If you kick your knees up Kick your knees up Kick your knees up Kick your knees up Step step step step step step step step step Step step step step step step step step step Never need a reason if you step in time A MAN HAS DREAMS / A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR (REPRISE) [GEORGE] I used to dream that when I grew up I'd learn everything there was to know about the stars. It's funny, I haven't thought about all that in years. I'm not usually sentimental. [BERT] Ah, it's good to look back sometimes. [GEORGE] Is it? I'm not so sure. A man has dreams of walking with giants To carve his niche in the edifice of time Before the mortar of his zeal Has a chance to congeal The cup is dashed from his lips The flame is snuffed aborning He's brought to rack and ruin in his prime [BERT] Life's a rum go, guv'nor, and that's the truth. [MR. BANKS] Do you know what I think? It's Mary Poppins. From the moment she stepped into this house, things began to happen to me. [BERT] Mary Poppins, eh? [GEORGE] Yes, yes of course. My world was calm, well-ordered, exemplary Then came this person with chaos in her wake And now my life's ambitions go with one fell blow It's quite a bitter pill to take It's that Poppins woman! She's responsible for all this. [BERT] I know the very person. 'Ere, what's that thing she's always saying? A spoonful of sugar, that is all it takes It changes bread and water into tea and cakes [GEORGE] There, you see, that's exactly what I mean. Changing bread and water into tea and cakes, indeed. No wonder everything's coming unstrung around here. [BERT] A spoonful of sugar goes a long, long way So 'ave yourself a healthy helping every day [GEORGE] A healthy helping of trouble, if you ask me. [BERT] Like you say, guv'nor. You've got to grind, grind, grind at that grindstone Though childhood slips like sand through a sieve And all too soon they've up and grown And then they've flown And it's too late for you to give Just that spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down The medicine go down, medicine go down Well, good luck, guv'nor. [GEORGE] Thank you... Bert. And good luck to you, too. ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN [MARY POPPINS] Anything can happen if you let it Sometimes things are difficult but you can bet it Doesn't have to be so [JANE] Changes can be made [MICHAEL] You can move a mountain if you use a larger spade [MARY POPPINS] Anything can happen, it's a marvel [MICHAEL] You can be a butterfly [JANE] Or just stay larval [JANE & MICHAEL] Stretch your mind beyond fantastic Dreams are made of strong elastic [MARY POPPINS] Take some sound advice and don't forget it [WINIFRED, JANE & MICHAEL] Anything can happen if you let it [WINIFRED] I wonder... [ALL] Anything can happen if you let it [WINIFRED] You won't know a challenge until you've met it [MICHAEL] No one does it for you [WINIFRED] No one but yourself Vacillating violets get left up on the shelf Anything can happen, just imagine [MARY POPPINS] That should be epitaph I wear the badge in Hhonour of this world's free thinkers [WINIFRED] Those who see beyond their blinkers [JANE & MICHAEL] Jelly isn't jelly [WINIFRED, JANE & MICHAEL] 'Til you set it Anything can happen if you let it [MARY POPPINS] Anything can happen if you let it What good is a whistle [BERT] Unless you whet it [MARY POPPINS & BERT] Broaden your horizons [BERT] Open different doors [MARY POPPINS & BERT] You may find a you there that you never knew was yours [BERT & MRS CORRY] Anything can happen [MRS CORRY] Raise the curtain Things you though impossible [BERT & MRS CORRY] Will soon seem certain Thought at first it may sound clownish See the world more upside-downish Turn it on its head then pirouette it [BERT, MRS CORRY & LAMP-LIGHTERS] Anything can happen if you let it [MARY POPPINS] If you reach for the stars All you get are the stars But we've found a whole new spin If you reach for the heavens You get the stars thrown in [ALL] You get the stars thrown in If you reach for the stars All you get are the stars But we've found a whole new spin If you reach for the heavens You get the stars thrown in Anything can happen if you let it Life is out there waiting so go and get it Grab it by the collar, seize it by the scruff Once you've started living life you just can't get enough Anything can happen, it's official You can choose the super or the superficial Sally forth the way we're steering Obstacles start disappearing Go and chase your dreams you won't regret it Anything can happen (Anything can happen) Anything can happen [MARY POPPINS, JANE & MICHAEL] Anything can happen [ALL] If you let it A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR (FINALE) / A SHOOTING STAR [MARY POPPINS] With every job when it's complete There is a sense of bittersweet That moment when you know the task is done Though in your heart you'd like to stay To help things on their way You've always known They must do it alone There. Practically perfect, and I hope it remains so. [WINIFRED] Mary Poppins? [MICHAEL] Mary Poppins has gone. [JANE] She's gone because we don't need her anymore. And other families will. [WINIFRED] I wonder if she's right, George. And we really could do without a nanny from now on. What do you think? [GEORGE] I think you'd better come and dance with me. [WINIFRED] George, this is serious. [GEORGE] Look! Wasn't that a shooting star? [MICHAEL] You can borrow my telescope. [GEORGE] I was right. Wish on it, children. Winifred... My dearest love. [JANE] We won't forget you, Mary Poppins. [MICHAEL] We'll never forget.